He doesn’t have words to tell her because he doesn’t know what he wants or what he needs or even what these feelings are. If there were thoughts there might be words but right now he had none of those either.
He doesn’t pull his hand away when she touches him, it’s like grounding feeling suddenly. If he had logic to the thought it would be obvious, the Red Room had always worked with both reward and punishments in his training. The rewards were small like outside food, like a small touch from someone to say good job, one time he’d had his hair washed for him even. The little bit of teasing humanity that they let him have was always amplified by the touches from Natasha.
It grounds him even to this day.
He rubs at his temples more in desperation, his head becoming worse, as if it really could at all.
He searches for words that aren’t there, before sighing.
“I don’t know, I can’t find words,” he says hesitantly, “I’m confused.”
no subject
He doesn’t pull his hand away when she touches him, it’s like grounding feeling suddenly. If he had logic to the thought it would be obvious, the Red Room had always worked with both reward and punishments in his training. The rewards were small like outside food, like a small touch from someone to say good job, one time he’d had his hair washed for him even. The little bit of teasing humanity that they let him have was always amplified by the touches from Natasha.
It grounds him even to this day.
He rubs at his temples more in desperation, his head becoming worse, as if it really could at all.
He searches for words that aren’t there, before sighing.
“I don’t know, I can’t find words,” he says hesitantly, “I’m confused.”