Natasha is almost 100% certain that Loki being her drinking buddy is baffling to at least half the people she knows. But it's thanks almost entirely to the fact that she's pretty sure she's figured him out. Or mostly figured him out. He's not inherently evil, he's just inherently an absolute shit.
And she's spent the better part of the last decade wrangling Clint Barton. She knows how to get along with absolute shits.
The only difference this evening is that she has very clear instructions that she will be the one hitting the drink a little harder than strictly necessary. She gives him a dour look as she knocks back a shot of vodka. Her mouth is curled in a half smirk as she sets the glass down.
"When I said you were paying tonight, I meant with your own money."
If someone had told him a few years ago that he would regularly get drinks with the Black Widow he would have laughed and then probably stabbed them. Now it is one of his favorite ways to pass the time on Midgard.
With a flick of his wrist a black billfold appears in his hand. He takes another sip of the neon green cocktail and smirks.
"It is my money." He just so happens to have a wallet with the Stark Industry's logo on it.
"Just because you're physically holding it doesn't mean that it's your money," Natasha points out, without turning her head. She could see that little flicker of his magic out of the corner of her eye and she knows what that means.
The bartender pours her another shot and she dutifully takes it.
Then she turns her head, looks at the billfold, then arches a brow pointedly as she looks up at him. "I know you're more creative than that."
"What is it Barton said the other day? Finders keepers?" He turns the wallet over in his hand as Natasha downs her shot and signals to the bartender to bring her another.
"He may not notice, but it does feel good having expensive drinks with Stark's coin. Perhaps later we can purchase a gift for him." He grins.
"Barton also yelled 'yeet' when he got chucked into a dumpster the other day," Natasha points out. "Not exactly what I'd consider a fount of wisdom." Make no mistake - he's absolutely her best friend. He's just also one step away from disaster even on a good day.
She makes a thoughtful noise as she downs her newly delivered shot, then instructs the bartender, "make the next one a dry vodka martini or I'm going to be on the floor by eight. Thanks." Crossing her legs, she half turns so she can look at Loki properly, her expression amused. "Not sure we'd have room for anything but the ego if we had the two of you in a room together."
Loki snickers at the memory of Thor throwing Barton into the dumpster at the archer's request. He had not been there himself, but the video had been sent to him. He still watches it still whenever he needs a pick-me-up and can't get up the energy to mess with people's coffee orders.
"Oh I wasn't planning on being there when he finds it. At least not in a way he would notice." A far off look crosses Loki's face; the look he gets when he's scheming something.
One brow arches as she listens to his response and takes in the look on his face. The bartender delivers her martini and she pauses for a moment to thank him.
Her mouth lilts into a small smirk as she turns back, lifting her glass toward Loki in the vague approximation of a toast.
"Are you sure you're not the god of avoiding confrontation?"
"There is a difference between avoiding conflict and sitting back to watch a good plan unfold."
He clinks the rim of his glass against hers before taking another sip. He has to keep remind himself that he needs to go slow tonight. It's Natasha's turn to get shitfaced.
"What would you suggest we purchase for him? An animal of some sort? Perhaps a peacock?"
"And that different hinges on your insistence on messing with Tony," Natasha points out. She's not entirely sure how much patience he would have if he were able to tie Loki to any manner of shenanigans. But she's pretty sure he wouldn't be particularly forgiving.
She's just not sure whether his retaliation would be conflict or prank based. Or both.
"No more animals after the stag," she counters. She takes a thoughtful sip of her drink. "Replace the tires on his new car with wheels of cheese?"
"His reactions are just so amusing." Loki is sure Stark knows it is him, his signature is rather distinct, but wants to catch him in the act before making a move. Or he is trying to find a way to prank him back.
"Oh, I like that idea. Though I would like to point out that the stag issue was mostly your fault."
"Saying things like that are why you never get invited to holiday parties," Natasha points out. It's that millennia old amused by humans vibe. She's pretty sure Thor only gets a pass when he does it because his glee isn't quite so...fiendish.
One of her brows arches at his counterpoint. "You're the one secretly harboring - what was it, carnivorous goblins?"
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And she's spent the better part of the last decade wrangling Clint Barton. She knows how to get along with absolute shits.
The only difference this evening is that she has very clear instructions that she will be the one hitting the drink a little harder than strictly necessary. She gives him a dour look as she knocks back a shot of vodka. Her mouth is curled in a half smirk as she sets the glass down.
"When I said you were paying tonight, I meant with your own money."
no subject
With a flick of his wrist a black billfold appears in his hand. He takes another sip of the neon green cocktail and smirks.
"It is my money." He just so happens to have a wallet with the Stark Industry's logo on it.
no subject
The bartender pours her another shot and she dutifully takes it.
Then she turns her head, looks at the billfold, then arches a brow pointedly as she looks up at him. "I know you're more creative than that."
no subject
"He may not notice, but it does feel good having expensive drinks with Stark's coin. Perhaps later we can purchase a gift for him." He grins.
no subject
She makes a thoughtful noise as she downs her newly delivered shot, then instructs the bartender, "make the next one a dry vodka martini or I'm going to be on the floor by eight. Thanks." Crossing her legs, she half turns so she can look at Loki properly, her expression amused. "Not sure we'd have room for anything but the ego if we had the two of you in a room together."
no subject
"Oh I wasn't planning on being there when he finds it. At least not in a way he would notice." A far off look crosses Loki's face; the look he gets when he's scheming something.
no subject
Her mouth lilts into a small smirk as she turns back, lifting her glass toward Loki in the vague approximation of a toast.
"Are you sure you're not the god of avoiding confrontation?"
no subject
He clinks the rim of his glass against hers before taking another sip. He has to keep remind himself that he needs to go slow tonight. It's Natasha's turn to get shitfaced.
"What would you suggest we purchase for him? An animal of some sort? Perhaps a peacock?"
no subject
She's just not sure whether his retaliation would be conflict or prank based. Or both.
"No more animals after the stag," she counters. She takes a thoughtful sip of her drink. "Replace the tires on his new car with wheels of cheese?"
no subject
"Oh, I like that idea. Though I would like to point out that the stag issue was mostly your fault."
no subject
One of her brows arches at his counterpoint. "You're the one secretly harboring - what was it, carnivorous goblins?"